I hear it all the time. Why can't I find the man/woman of my dreams? Why don't I I have the life I want? Why am I having trouble making more money? Have you ever noticed that these questions are usually asked by by people who are not getting what they want? It turns out that their questions are also the reason they aren't getting it.

Most of the highly successful people I have meet to date tend to focus in two areas: finding ways to provide outstanding value and finding ways to expand their exposure. When people focus their business on both of these two areas, money just seems to comes to them. It's a matter of quality vs quantity,or  in other words, working smarter instead of harder. Best of all, it works for both busines and personal relationships.

My personal formula for success is as follows:

Vision + Value + Action + Exposure + Accessibility + Review = Success

Vision: Know what you want and then figure out how to make it happen. If your vision doesn't excite you, it's probably not the right vision for you. Go back to the drawing board and try again making sure to be congruent with your top values. Your personal determination will only take you so far before you become discourage and give up. Passion, that is what will drive you all the way to success.

Value: Have you ever purchased a product or received a service and were just satisfied or possibly even disappointed? I suspect you've also been somewhere where your expectations were not only meet, but were exceeded. For example, you might have received something extra, something unexpected, something that perhaps you really appreciated? It may not have even been something physical. It could have been the way you were treated, a polite word, a little extra attention or even just a smile. Something that affected the way you felt afterwards.

Now which of these two places or people would you recommend to your friends? When you are the consumer and are faced with a similar choice, which would you choose yourself? Clients who are thrilled with your products or services will recommend you to their friends, family, colleages, possibly even their employers. They are your best sales force… and you don't even have to pay them.

Remember, people won't or pay you for what you want. People will hire you because of the value you can bring to them. Focus on other people and think about how you can be of more value to them.

Action: 100% of people who never take action will fail. You may not have the perfect plan, but does anybody really? The fact is that it is easier to learn from and correct mistakes than it is to create a perfect plan. It's just riding a bicycle. You can turn the steering wheel any way you want, but unless your bike is moving, you won't be getting anywhere too soon and will most likely just fall down.

So what can you do today? It doesn't matter if it is something big or small. Perhaps it is something you have been putting off. The important thing is that you start by taking some action, moving and building momentum so that you can steer your life in the direction you want instead of letting everyone else in the world control your destiny.

Exposure: Think back to when you were a teenager and started being interested in dating. How long did it take before you started letting someone know you were interested in them? Some people never actually got around to it and years later regret it. If you are single but wish you weren't, why would anyone come knocking on your door if they don't even know you exist?

Business is another form of relationships. If you are seeking to get a job, to get a promotion or are making the move from corporate life to one of self-employment, people can only give you what you want if they are aware of the value you have to offer them. They are not going to come knocking on your door if they don't even know you exist, if they don't know of your interests or they don't know of ability to meet their needs.

So get out there and let people know who you are and what value you have to offer. Be proud and let them know you are interested in dealing with them.

Accessibility: You've started a new business on the side and can't seem to get past a certain level of income. Off the top of my head, there can be two reasons for this. One is that your identity, in essence who you believe you are, doesn't support your getting beyond a certain income level. Another reason might be that your line of products or services is priced beyond the financial comfort level of some potential clients. Ways you can get around this might include creating products which are less expensive or group rates for your services, so that people can try you out without making a big financial commitment. Teleclasses, group sessions, audio recordings, books, eClasses are examples of affordable products which will enable people to get to know you without ending up in the poor house. If you do these well, your customers comfort level will go up as they see that you can really meet their needs and make a difference in their lives. They will start to feel that there is less of a risk and even feel more confident in you and become your client.

As for personal relationships, just how accessible are you? If your agenda is booked solid from the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep, how exactly are you going to fit a personal realtionship into your life?

Review: If you aren't managing to live the life you really want, review the above formula and make sure that you are doing an outstanding job of fulfilling each of these requirements. 80% of our success in life comes from 20% of our efforts. Notice what is working and change what isn't. We learn nothing from success other than we have learned everything we can. Failures are nothing more than an opportunity to learn and grow so that we can eventually succeed.

If things are still not working out for you, go into your common sense corner and take a look at what is going on. Does is your vision congruent with your values? You may discover that you have an inner conflict which needs to be identified and resolved.

I know you have the courage within yourself to get that momentum started. Take one action step today to get the ball rolling towards a Great Life.

Success: Forget everything anyone ever told you about what it means to be successful and consider what success mean to you. What success feel like to you is completely dependant on your own values, just as success means something different to everyone else. Consider the specific results you want in advance so that you will recognize it when you have successfully achieved it. There are people out there today who are living the life they really want, not because they are better than you but because they know what they want. The clearer you are about what success means to you, the easier it will be to recognize it.  It may involve money, it may involve relationships, it may involve just really feeling good about yourself, or it may involve finding a way to live one more day. In most cases, you will find that they all follow the above formula for financial success.

I believe it was Thomas Edison who once said: "Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up" .  The inventor of the light bulb also said "If I find 10,000 ways something won't work, I haven't failed. I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward".

What have you given up in your life? What have you compromised your way out of? What if you've been lied to and  that you really can have it all?

With warmest regards,

Life Coach Michael Milette

Take what makes sense to you in life and leave the rest. --- Michael Milette

Did You Know? A common sense corner is a place within yourself where you leave your feelings behind in order to look at a situation from an objective and open minded point of view. Some people find it helps to designate a special physical location like a chair, a room or go to some other location.